


Light Amongst the Dark

by Cherrypie55



Series: Vault Era one shots [6]
Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Blind Twelfth Doctor, F/M, Minor The Doctor | Theta Sigma/The Master | Koschei (Doctor Who: Academy Era), The Vault (Doctor Who)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-04
Updated: 2020-06-04
Packaged: 2021-03-04 00:09:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,282
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24544402
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cherrypie55/pseuds/Cherrypie55
Summary: Set between S10 ep05 Oxygen and S10 ep06 Extremis.The Doctor confesses to Missy that he is blind and all she wants is to help him. But will he take advantage of that in his vulnerable state?'Missy would have given him anything in that moment. Anything to make his pain stop.'Another part in my Vault Era series.
Relationships: Twelfth Doctor/Missy
Series: Vault Era one shots [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1702705
Comments: 4
Kudos: 37





	Light Amongst the Dark

  
Missy was sat inside the vault, she was leant with her back pressed up against the door as she listened to the Doctor on the other side. He was blind. Once she would have revelled in the fact that her captor had a weakness but now it made her hurt. It was a strange feeling, her hearts were racing and she felt warm, unnaturally so, her breath came out faster than normal as he told her what had happened. He was scared, she could tell, could practically feel it coming off him in waves through the door. She turned her head to press her cheek against the rough metal. He was sat too, like her mirror image on the other side, the vault had dulled some her of Time Lady abilities but she could still sense his presence, could feel him there. She tried to project comfort but that was still something she was working on and Missy wasn't sure she was doing a good job of it. When she felt the Doctor move away from the door she was sure she hadn’t got it right which made her all the more surprised when she heard the mechanical clicking of the locks. She barely had time to stand up and get away from the door when it opened in front of her.

The Doctor walked in, sonic sunglasses in place, _to hide his eyes_ Missy thought with a pang of sadness. He was so strong, she would never admit it to his face but he always had been, he had fought during the Time War ended it even while she had ran, he always carried on even when he should have been broken, the year on the Valiant had proven that, it hit her like a physical blow to see him like this. Outwardly he looked fine but there was something in his walk that hinted at it, he was vulnerable. He almost had an aura of grief and fear around him. It was unbearable. 

He stopped in front of her “Missy.” was all he said before she threw herself at him.

Her arms went around his neck, one hand clutching the back of his head as she held the Doctor to her. Missy hadn't even thought it through she just needed him to stop hurting, needed him to be the Doctor with his air of arrogance that came with being cleverer than almost everyone else. He was tense in her arms.

“What are you doing?” he whispered in her ear.

Even his voice seemed different, less confident.

“Comfort. Remember?” she whispered back.

“I remember.” He sighed.

He wasn’t hugging her back but that was okay. He let her hold him. After a few moments Missy pulled back resting her forehead against his, her hands moved to his temples and before he had a chance to say no she reached out to him with her mind. She knew she should have asked first it wasn't the nicest experience if you weren’t expecting it but she knew he would say no. He never accepted help and she knew she could help this was something she could do. 

She opened her eyes and looked at him, she heard him gasp, his body went rigid and she felt his shock ripple through her mind as she projected what she saw into his. As she shared her sight with him. 

“Missy.” He said again his voice almost trembling this time. 

His shaky breath was warm on her face.

She pulled away, with her body and mind, shaking her head. Doubt flooded through her. _I'm so stupid. We don't do that. Not anymore. Not in such a long time. Lifetimes._

“I'm sorry I shouldn’t have.” The apology came easily which probably should have surprised her.

It was the Doctor that reached for her then, his hand snaking out and grabbing her wrist. Panic briefly flared in the back of her mind, a reminder from years past. But his quiet voice drew her back, barely more than a whisper and so full of emotion.

“Don’t.” He visibly swallowed as though saying the words was a great effort “Don’t stop.”

They stood there as if frozen in time. Being a Time Lady Missy knew that wasn’t the case but the seconds between his quiet request and her response seemed to stretch on unnaturally. His hand gently holding her wrist, bodies a few inches apart, his face angled towards her as though he was staring straight into her eyes. _But he’s blind_ the thought hurt just as much each time it crossed her mind. 

“Okay.”

Missy turned and begun walking slowly towards the Doctor's favourite armchair, the one he always sat in when he visited her. Her hand grasped his as she walked away dragging him gently with her. Her mind was racing a mile a minute _I can help, he wants me to help. But he never wants help, how bad is it that the Doctor is letting me help? How much is he suffering? What if I can’t help him? What if I make it worse?_

As they reached the chair Missy guided the Doctor into it. She knew he was using his sunglasses to provide him with a layout of his immediate surroundings but she helped him anyway and he didn't scold her for it or deem it unnecessary. She sat on the floor in front of him, his legs either side of her, facing out into the vault. She reached for his hands and he obliged, placing them against her temples Missy opened her mind to the Doctor. She didn't have to coax him this time, his mind reached out and slipped into hers finding it’s way to the vision centres of her brain. His head came down to rest against the back of hers and he inhaled sharply as he gained her vision. It was almost like he was breathing in the scent of her hair but Missy knew that wasn’t true. She didn’t try to probe into his mind or his thoughts, just allowed him to see what she did as she looked around the vault. 

“It's not the most exciting view I know.” Missy confessed after a few moments of silence.

She had been so sure she could help him to see that she had forgotten that she had nothing to show. The vault was scarcely furnished at best and Missy was well acquainted with how dull it was. Then an idea began to form.

“I can show you something else? If you like?” she asked quietly.

Missy felt the Doctor nod and heard his sharp intake of breath as she made to stand up. 

“I need to reach you too dear.” She said in response to his unasked question.

Missy sat herself sideways across the Doctor's lap, her legs hanging over the arm of the chair. She shuffled a little to make herself comfortable before gently moving the Doctor's head so their foreheads were touching. She extended her mind outwards into his and silently encouraged him to do the same. It took Missy by surprise how natural it felt, it had been a long time since she had done this with someone of her own species, willingly that is. Their consciousness’s swirling together like tendrils of smokes curling around one another. She remembered, with a flush of embarrassment at getting distracted, she was supposed to be showing the Doctor something. Missy felt the Doctor react to her embarrassment with feelings of mild amusement and comfort. 

_It's a memory_. Missy thought, not seeing the point in speaking aloud, she knew the Doctor could hear her. She led him to a specific memory, her last good one before being imprisoned in fact, they watched like a movie but they were seeing through Missy's eyes. She didn’t let the Doctor hear her remembered thoughts though as she was sure they were less than ‘good’. It was a planet of course, she would never choose somewhere boring to show him, with a dazzling purple sky and as they looked up they could see twin moons shining. It was warm, almost unbearably so, as they made their way through jungle-like undergrowth to a clearing with a pool of shimmering water in it. The turquoise water reflected the light of the two moons and the Missy in the memory sighed as she wiped the sweat from her forehead. 

_This was before Skaro_ , she said speaking telepathically to the Doctor again. She felt his mind hum in recognition to what she was saying. They continued to watch as the Missy from the memory bent down and dipped a finger in the water. Missy felt a ripple of annoyance from the Doctor that she had touched the water without knowing it was safe, she smiled liking that he was concerned. Memory Missy concluded the water was safe enough and began to take off her jacket. It was when she begun to unbutton her blouse current Missy begun to feel embarrassed again. She had forgotten about this part of the trip, although clearly not truly forgotten as her and the Doctor were watching as she stripped down to nothing before dipping a bare toe into the water. Tentatively finding her footing she submerged herself into the turquoise depths and began to swim. Thankfully the water hid most of her naked body, Missy hadn't intended to give the Doctor _that_ kind of show. Although surely he could feel her embarrassment like he did before. He must know it wasn't her intention to show him that. Missy switched her attention back to the memory as the cool water washed over her remembered self, feeling so refreshing against her overheated skin. She swam a near perfect breaststroke across the pool and back again until she was able to stand and start walking back to the edge where her clothes were neatly piled. The heat hit her as soon as she stood and she longed to stay in the water but she knew she had to keep moving, the cool drips rolling down her body tempting her to return to the water. 

Missy's thoughts wandered again to the fact she was practically giving the Doctor a peep show which really wasn't what she meant to do, she thought that last bit a bit louder to make sure the Doctor got the message. The Doctor who was being surprisingly quiet. No mocking or scolding or any real thoughts about what she was showing. Missy opened her eyes leaving the Doctor alone in her memories. He had one arm behind her holding the arm of the chair, his other was across her his hand gripping her waist. He was warm, more so than a Time Lord naturally was, she could feel his forehead was slightly damp against hers. His eyes were hidden behind those stupid glasses although it didn't make much difference now. His breathing slightly faster than normal too. _Probably a reaction to being able to see something_ she thought. It hadn't really dawned on Missy until that moment just how close they were to one another. Their foreheads were touching to provide the telepathic connection but they must have subconsciously moved because their entire faces were practically pressed together now. Each had their lips parted, Missy realised her breathing was just as ragged as the Doctor's, they were so close they would have been kissing if either were moving their lips, instead they were just breathing each other’s air. 

Arousal flared inside her briefly and Missy so badly wanted to kiss him but she didn't. She was helping the Doctor nothing else. She had all but forgotten they were still linked, that he could feel what she did, and was surprised when she felt the stirrings of emotion from him. He shut his mind down as quickly as the feelings were out there. Pulling his head away from her physically as well. She watched as he swallowed. They were both still breathless. Missy's mind was reeling trying to comprehend what she had felt from him. It had felt almost like pride at her wanting to help and something else ... longing? That didn't make sense though. 

“I,” the Doctor began “I have to go.”

He shifted out from under her standing abruptly.

“Did it not help?” Missy asked, her voice sounding small.

“It's not that.” He said still standing with his back to her “It's ... we can't do that all the time, link like that, it's not fair.”

“Fair on who? We're Time Lords remember telepathy is kind of our thing.” She answered back her voice gaining strength now.

“That doesn't mean it's not taxing and it's not fair on either of us. It’s not fair for me to be able to see then have it taken away again and it’s not fair on you to use you to give me sight.” He was angry now.

“You're not using me! I want to help you.” Missy all but shouted. 

The Doctor sighed. His anger seemingly fading to nothing as he walked towards the door. He paused before opening it.

“No.” He said quietly into the vault.

Missy had stayed in that chair hours before finally moving to her bed. The Doctor was infuriating, she was helping she knew she was she had felt it in his mind how much he enjoyed what she had done, and helping was good so why was he insisting on her not helping him. Okay yes it was tiring maintaining a telepathic bond for that long but only because she was out of practice. She was sure if they did it more often that wouldn’t be the case, she had always been skilled at telepathy she was just rusty. 

She lay curled up under the covers in her bed. Already she missed the Doctor's presence in her mind, Missy had been half joking when she had said that telepathy was what Time Lords do but she wasn’t wrong. It was a part of their culture a common occurrence between lovers, friends. It wasn't like entering the mind of a human, so weak and easy to manipulate. Telepathy between Time Lords was a meeting of the minds, a way to share everything, anything. It wasn’t the first time her and the Doctor had done that though it was definitely the first time in centuries. They had done it quite often back on Gallifrey, before the war, back even before they were the Master and the Doctor. 

Tears clouded Missy's vision as she remembered the times they had shared. She wasn't quite sure if they were happy tears or sad. As she heard the noise of the vault door opening she stilled, feigning sleep. She knew it was him as soon as he entered, the Doctor walked through the vault and stood beside her bed, still Missy did not move. He removed his sonic sunglasses and placed them inside his coat pocket, he looked down towards her with his unseeing eyes and knelt beside her bed his head in his hands as though he were praying. To whom Missy didn’t know. She reached her hand out running her fingers through his curls that were almost as wild as her own. He didn’t look up at her as he spoke, although there wouldn’t have been any point in doing so they both knew he could see her. 

“Please?” was all the Doctor asked.

Missy would have given him anything in that moment. Anything to make his pain stop.

“Come here.” She replied tugging gently on his hand.

He stood, removing his coat and shoes, before climbing into her bed. It scared Missy a little how out of sorts he was, in all her years in the vault he had never so much as sat on her bed, beside her in a chair but never on and definitely not under her covers lying face to face mere inches apart. She was worried for him, that he would never find a way past this, when he leant in towards her and placed his forehead against hers he felt all of it, her concern. She felt shock ripple through his consciousness though she didn't understand why. _I didn't expect you back so soon_ she spoke telepathically. 

_When someone can give you back what’s been taken it’s hard to resist_ his voice swirled inside her head carrying with it the guilt he felt at being back there. _I'm not giving it back I'm just trying to help make it more bearable_ she replied. _Anything is better than the darkness_ the Doctor admitted. _You don't need my memories for that you've got lifetimes of your own_ Missy tried to sound light hearted, to bring back some of their usual banter, to try and stop him falling too far into the dark. She felt him half laugh and half scoff at her _everyone knows that's not a fun place to be._ At least he was trying to joke with her, that was a start.

Their joined consciousness flared brightly as Missy dragged them into another of her memories. Orange sky burned above them as they watched their younger selves run through the red grass of Gallifrey. Missy felt a pang of loss from the Doctor which she soothed the best she could, though she didn't share the same sentiment he did for their homeland. They watched as Missy's younger self grabbed the Doctor by his hand. 

“Theta come on!” she, possibly he back then it was hard to remember, called to the Doctor.

They laughed as they ran. They were supposed to be in class at the Academy but she had convinced him to sneak out with her. Just over the crest of a hill she pulled him down with her so they were lying on their backs in the grass, hands still clasped together. Out of breath she looked at him and laughed at how ruffled he looked, he gave her a stern look before giggling along with her. 

As the sun's began to set and the stars came out the pair named all the ones they could see. 

“I can't wait to get out there and see them all.” The young Doctor told her.

Pointing up at the night sky she squinted as though she were thinking really hard.

“That one.” She declared pointing at a random constellation. “We'll go there first.”

_Your memories aren't all bad, I quite like this one_ Missy spoke to him. _We're in your memory Missy_ the Doctor told her but she could almost feel him smiling. _Ah but you remember this too, I suppose Gallifrey wasn’t all bad._

Missy's eyes fluttered open as she felt something wet against her cheek. She was crying again, or was it him? She wasn’t sure, their emotions swirling together as one. She laced one leg through his tangling their bodies to mirror their minds. His hand found hers between them and grasped it, like he was copying their younger selves. 

When she woke up she was alone.

_It must have been more tiring than I thought keeping that memory going_ Missy thought, with no one but herself there to hear it. There was a buzzing in her head like something nudging at her, _ah there!_ It was the Doctor he had left her a message of sorts for when she awoke. A brief panicked explanation that he had to go. Something about some monks and an email from himself and saving the day. Usual Doctor stuff. _At least he’s acting more like himself_ Missy thought happily.

She didn't know that it would be six months before she would see him again. Before she would see anyone.


End file.
